Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Looking at How We Handle Inevitable Conflict

Well, my DH was able to go out some on Sunday and we journeyed to Journey church again. The congregation takes several minutes to worship God in songs and then a second message in the series of My Crazy Family Life.

By the way, I understand this congregation offers smaller group studies through the week. That might be good to have more input from group members that share with one another. I have always enjoyed Sunday School classes that were full of participation.

But back to the notes from Sunday:  "Conflict is inevitable but combat is optional." If someone says they have a relationship without conflict they're not being honest. DH and I have been married for almost 40 years, love each other, but are not always in agreement, not always happy. But we talk and pray, forgive and cherish the positive.

A lot of scripture was shared from Proverbs because it gives a lot of advice and wisdom....
Pro 11:29 "He that troubles his house shall inherit the wind....
Pro 13:3 "He that keepeth his mouth keepeth his life but he that opens wide his lips shall have destruction"
Pro 15:1 "A soft answer turns away wrath, but grievous words stir up anger"
Many times its not what we say but HOW we say it. We've got to stop and think before we speak.  I know for me, when I'm real tired or not feeling well, my tone of voice can come out wrong when I don't mean for it to...or sometimes I give in to grouchiness at these times.
Pro 18:19"A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city and their contentions are like the bars of a castle"
Pro 19:11 "The discretion of a man defers his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression."
Overlook minor offences. Sometimes offences are not worth pointing out and getting upset about. We can handle some minor offences and enjoy peace. Everyone, including ourselves, are not always going to have the same opinion. Or we can stop and realize, hey that person is having a bad day and we should lay aside our anger and not make a big deal over a minor offense.
Pro 26:21..."A contentious man kindles strife" Are we one that likes to argue and keep things stirred up all the time?
A couple of funny stories were also shared. 1.The speakers wife was known to talk in her sleep. One night husband woke up to see wife staring at him and then she said to him "You just shut your mouth"....oh my, what a contentious phrase! The next day husband was angry and wife said what's wrong? He said "You ask me what's wrong after what you said?" Wife still clueless.. he tells her she told him to shut his mouth which causes her to laugh...that doesn't make husband feel any better. Then she said she didn't remember that at all...she was talking in her sleep with her eyes wide open. They both had a good laugh! 2. True story speaker heard about revenge: Wife getting ready for an important interview, dressing in her best dress. She asks husband to zip her up, which he does, but he plays with the zipper, up and down, till it accidentally breaks. Wife has to change clothes, is steaming about the broken zipper all day. When she comes home her husband is laying under the car fixing it. For revenge she zips his zipper up and down and then goes in the house. She sees her husband standing in the kitchen. She says "What are you doing in here? You were just out under the car!" No he says, that's our neighbor under there fixing the car. Point is don't try to get revenge, it can get you into all kinds of trouble.
Psalm 32:1 "Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered."
Summing it up:  There is going to be conflict in our life. But how do we handle it?  And as we learned last week, every conflict is not going to immediately be gone, but we need to keep trying and hoping and turning it over to God to work where we are unable to.

No comments:

Post a Comment